Absence makes the heart grows fonder?

I've been out of the squash scene for a good couple of months. First it was demands at home. Martina is on crutches for the third month now as a result of tearing her ACL and meniscus. So I stay home to be caretaker. Then I tore ligaments in my elbow when I threw my elbow and hyperextended it. This strain has been really long time in healing. It's going on month 3 and I still don't have full range of motion. Pain persists in the extreme extension or contraction of the elbow. The good news is I'm back to playing once a week since last week with the aid of a elbow brace that limits extensions.

The practices show that I'm returning to the game with inconsistency again. This is not a surprise given I've been out for so long. The extreme results puzzle me. In the same night I'm feeling weak and unfocused losing to unspectacular players, I'm winning against a really solid 4.5 player after having already spent 2 hours playing. I obviously and apparently regained focus and strength to beat Pankaj, but how I did that was quite sub-conscientious. I did not even realized something within me had changed other than to say I was happy when he invited me to play. I can remember the things that went through my mind. I thought about where my serve was going. I thought about when he would change things up from exchanging rallies to playing short to move me forward. Lastly I thought most about keeping the pace steady and firm. I blocked out a good deal of negativity. When my serve fell short and Pankaj killed it I blocked it out of my mind altogether.

On the technical side I executed a few maneuvers well, but didn't show a broad range of skills or shots. I didn't lob once and I didn't use deception from the front but only two deceptive crosses from three quarters that did pass Pankaj unawares. If Pankaj were to volley or cut off more of my drives and send them cross courts I think I would have been severely pressured. I was lucky to have played my game successfully without concentrating harder on watching him hit the ball. That would be the only way I could have been prepared for cross court exchanges. Lastly as Pankaj pointed out when we chatted afterwards that the one thing I showed consistent weakness was keeping my distance from the far back corner to return lobs and deep crosses. I was also lucky in that Pankaj seemed to forget to watch me when I was behind him. That is the only explanation for why my attacking short had the positive effects that it did.

All in all I cannot say whether the absence has any severe impact on my game. The jury is out on whether it cleared my head and gave me any fresh confidence.